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Testimonials from Better Dads
"I was really struggling with my teenage son. He was a great kid, but wasn't doing well with school. I tried every restriction and punishment I could think of andnone of it worked. The worst part was it was damaging our relationship. I worked with Wayne and he helped me understand how to work better with my son. One thing that he said that really helped me with decisions I had to make was, "When in doubt about what to do, err on the side of love."
My son did not end up doing things my way, but he did do things in a way we could both accept and he is doing great. Along the way I learned to incorporate some of his carefree and artistic ways and make things better for me. So in the end, rather than trying to make him be like me, I learned to support him to be the young man he wants to be. And in the process, he changed me for the better." -Rod |
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 "I had it all figured out. I was a successful man that had a happy childhood, a loving wife, close friends, money in the bank and many options. The success I had experienced throughout my life was always a result of setting goals and working hard to reach them. I was the master of my domain...in control. Then I became a parent. When my son turned 3, my wife and I began to realize that we had a high maintenance child that did not respond to "typical" parenting skills.
Our instincts did not serve us and we began to lose confidence. We were told by a child psychologist that most parents can get by with average parenting skills but we will need "black-belt" parenting skills to be effective with our defiant son. The tools that had served me so well in my life did not work anymore. I could not just work harder to fix my son's behavior challenges. I felt like a failure and very isolated from other parents that seemed to have things under control. I was failing my most important job, being a parent.
Wayne helped me see my son in a different light that gave me perspective so I could create a more healthy context in which to be a father to my son. And with the support of the men I have met through BetterMen, I have learned much about myself and it has helped me be the dad my son needs, not necessarily the dad I wanted to be. Wayne's goal is to make good men better, and I feel he has succeeded with me." -Marc
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| "It's 2 a.m. as the front door opens. Once again my teenage son is late on his curfew. As I race down the steps we both brace for the impending confrontation. Heels dug in deep, faces tighten, anger beginning to boil. My wife hurries down after me to begin her tearful role as referee. Our faces meet in the foyer. I take a deep breath as my face softens and ask, "Is everything alright." "Yes Dad, sorry I'm late, I'll explain in the morning. I love you". "We love you to son, goodnight." Thanks Wayne" -Steve |
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"For me it always comes back to the wisdom of the men. Doing this work, in this circle of men, has taught me lessons about being a man, husband and father that I'm positive my dad would have taught me, had he known how. Wayne has shown me that being a good father begins with me being the best man I can be. That's the standard we hold each other to in my men's group. Their wisdom has helped me through the many moments of fear, shame and doubt that life inevitably serves up. With the help of the men I can give my kids something I never had; being raised in a home where there is a love affair going on. It's the best gift I can give them." -Eddie |
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"I have always been concerned about staying communicative with my girls as they matured into young ladies. I have learned a lot from other men at the Center who share the same concerns and who have had experience dealing with similar situations. My son and I have a strong relationship with open communication. I owe a lot of this great relationship to the tools and voice of experience that other men have shared.
My work with Wayne has helped me become the dad that I had always wanted to be. At first I was so excited about becoming a father but something changed slowly as my kids got older. I lost patience with my children very quickly and was always preoccupied and thinking about business when I was with my family. I was not happy nor was it who I wanted to be.
Working with Wayne has helped me gain a new perspective on what it means to be a dad. He has helped me become much more mentally and emotionally present when I spend time with my family by pointing out patterns that I was not previously aware of. I recommend working with Wayne for any dad that is looking to improve his relationships with his children." -Mike |
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| "Wayne Levine has helped me tremendously at a challenging time as a man and father. With both a daughter and son under the age of 10, I needed clarity and new ideas in how to show up differently and to be a good example for each child. Wayne delivers compassion, expert listening, and common sense suggestions in a positive way that has enhanced my confidence and instinct as a single father." -Steve |
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 "I never thought that I would be capable of loving another human being the way that I love my kids. I remember the day the twins were born (I carried this over to the day my other son was born too) as I was walking out to the car going home and I made a commitment to them; I would be the best dad that I could possibly be. Period! Growing up I felt that with my father there were strings attached to his love; if I did this I would get his love…if I accomplished this then he would be proud of me.
With my kids, I didn't want that. I chose to love them unconditionally. Now that didn't mean that I would spoil them or let them go through life without learning the lessons, it just meant that I would be there for them no matter what. Using the BetterMen Tools has helped me be the dad I want to be. In fact, I was talking about using tools with one of my sons last night while watching a reality TV show and he asked, "Do grown-ups have cool tools like I do?" I replied, "You bet, I have tools just like you.
One of my sons wrote me a letter last year stating the four reasons why he loved me. I cried when I read it and have it in my office at home as a reminder that they're always watching. Even though they're a lot of work at times, they are the greatest things to ever happen to me. I'm grateful to Wayne for helping me to be the dad I committed to be for my boys." -Brian |
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| "Fathering children is tough work. Not only does the relationship with your kids test you, but so does the relationship with your wife. Sometimes it feels like going 15 rounds in the ring with your hands tied. But working with Wayne really helped me separate what was important, and what I needed to let go of. Once I figured out what I stood for, everything seemed easier and I was a much happier and successful father, husband and person." -Larry |
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